I Do What I Want: If I'm Nude, I'm Nervous

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

If I'm Nude, I'm Nervous

So I just had a moment:

I am incapable of making new friends.

This I realized while I was naked in the shower (my place of thought). Finding this out while being naked was sad in and of itself (saying "in and of itself at the end of a sentence is like wearing your thong higher than your jeans). Am I incapable of making new friends because of the way I look naked? And if so, how does everyone know what I look like naked?

I digress.

It is not that I am incapable of making new friends because I have weird shoe-polish breath or have an obsession with other people's deodorant. It is that every time I meet someone, we get along, we have fun, we get along, fun is had, and then I find excuses in my mind of why I am too busy to continue contacting them.

I am incapable of maintaining new relationships. I am very freaking serious right now. It scares me.

I am very much partially freaking out at this moment. I would be very much completely freaking out if I were naked. I may just get naked in the living room right now to indulge in a full-on nude nervous breakdown.

I wont. Carrie just walked in to get water. She looked at me like she was glad I was clothed. I don't get that look too often (you know.. because everyone wants to see me naked).

See that parenthetical display of overconfidence! I am hiding in those parentheses by making a joke and avoiding my deficiency in character.

All of these manic thoughts came into mind when I started thinking about Blanche from Streetcar Named Desire. I am playing her in my acting class and trying very hard to bring this complex character to life. In the midst of trying to act as another person, I uncovered a very dark and upsetting place within my own psyche. I never know how to use the word psyche.

Real talk: I'm worried that I am crazy. I want to know why I cannot relax and enjoy the good in my life. Why must I constantly blog about these higher issues and intense psychological questions? Why can I not let myself just be happy?

Why can I not let myself let new people in my life? Let is a funny word. Let...let, let, let, let, let, let.

Well, I know there are many answers for such questions and I fear delving into any of them. I guess I'm going to have to. Or I'm going to have to buy a bunch of cats.

Do you remember Shep Huntleigh?

So you're reading this and asking yourself, "Why am I reading this?"

BECAUSE, as always, reading my blog makes you feel better about yourself. Sad! That's mean.

See.. I was about to publish this post after that last statement but then I felt really unsatisfied. I always blog for answers, but this blog has left me with no answers and many more questions. That is more than mildly frustrating!

I have reached the nucleus of Katlyn and don't know where to go from here. Her nucleus resembles a Mexican ghetto where things are sketchy yet sexy .

She has begun speaking in third person.

SHE IS CRAZY!

She must be naked.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...: I found your blog. I feel like I sneaked into your underwear drawer and I'm sniffing your panties. Disturbing imagery? Maybe.

In response to this post: I knew you hated me. UGH, you fuckin HATE me!

Not really. For realz, my KK, I'm the same way. I love having friends and having fun, but it's hard for me to keep in touch or go out of my way to see them. Sometimes being alone just seems more convenient.

But I need to stop that shit, and so do you! I will not let our relationship be a silly one night stand, a fling, a fly in the pants. I'm just not that kind of girl. Hmmmph. *sticks nose into air*; November 19, 2008 at 9:48 AM
Mitch said...: those parentheticals are where you keep me.; November 25, 2008 at 9:05 AM

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Food, Water, and Shelter

We are all very aware of the environmental movement taking place due to global climate change. Finally, many people of all sorts are listening to the earth and making more sustainable choices. Even my grandparents are recycling, and if the elderly can change their ways then this thing must be happening. I am an environmentalist and promote environmental protection through a vegan lifestyle. Many think of me as an animal rights fiend who would jump in front of moving traffic to save a frog (which is true), but I am also a planet rights fiend who would jump in front of traffic to save the planet. Meat-eating is one of the worst contributors to global warming. Qué? I hear your question and I'll tell you what I can. Factory farming is the corporate means of raising and slaughtering animals for meat. There are often times THOUSANDS of animals on a single farm. Not only are the crowded conditions horrendous and nightmarish for the animals who suffer them every day until they are killed, but they also cause the accumulation of excrement and other bodily wastes that pollute the land, and especially the water. The feces have extraordinarily damaging effects on the ecosystems near the farms. Plants and animals become mutated or extinct in massive quantities because of the animal wastes that come from this feces and the drug-laden animal carcasses. The EPA states that 35,000 miles of rivers in 22 states contaminated groundwater in 17 states. This pollution not only ruins the ecosystems that surround these contaminated areas, but also our drinking water. Besides the groundwater, oceans suffer the effects of animal farming. Much of the animal wastes from farming in the middle US merges into the Mississippi River and thus empties into the Gulf of Mexico. Nitrogen from the polluted river sparks major algae growth and diminishes oxygen for other plant and animal life.

These are just small examples of a major problem swallowing this planet. If humans continue to eat meat at the ravenous rate, the pollution will soon return the favor. There is no action without a reaction, and it is becoming obvious that our selfish and indulgent ways are killing us and future generations. Vegetarianism is a PERFECT way to stop the damage and cleanse this planet. We all can relate to the need for food, water, and shelter. If we can harmonize these elements into a sustainable process, then we will all surely prosper. Eat veggie, have clean water, and save our shelter.

Food is change.

Change your food.

Intrinsic Value For Sale

Money is manmade. It is not precious. It has no intrinsic value. We give it all the value it possesses, yet somehow it still manages to control us and causes us to do or permit some things to be done that we would not do otherwise.

You are not an animal rights activist. You care about other things and are busy as a beaver in a blue lagoon bathed in sunlight with a smell of oncoming rain looming in the air. You know what I'm talking about.

Anyways.... the point is, you don't have to completely agree with us hippies and be an activist to have a place in your heart against animal cruelty. It is my belief that animal testing can be an issue that all humans agree about given the right information.

While animal testing in the medical field is very controversial and required, animal testing in cosmetics, cleaning supplies, and other chemical industries is unnecessary, disgusting, and completely avoidable. We all bathe (even us hippies) and all like to smell so fresh and so clean clean when we gunna get some (some can be defined as whatever you like to get while smelling good). With an industry that is SOOOO largely a part of our lives, we SHOULD be informed about it. Face it, corporations define many aspects of our lives and too often we trust that they are doing the right things for our health, our families, and our planet. Truly, though, most corporations... well all.... only care about money and are held at very low standards by law enforcement. We need to take the power away from useless green paper and back into the considerate minds of humans. Giving up products that are tested on animals is an amazing means to change. That would save the lives of MILLIONS of animals every year and raise the standards of corporations in all respects. If we pay attention, they have to do what we want.

I shop for only products not tested on animals. At first, it was hard to find what grocery stores/pharmacies carried such products. It wasn't long though before I realized that I could buy all soaps, lotions, shampoos, detergents, house cleaners, and dog/cat foods, that are cruelty free. There are many other perks to buying such products besides saving animals. Most avoid harmful chemicals that are linked to causing cancer. Also, many are much less harmful to the environment. If animals aren't your motivation, let the fact that you and your family could live healthier in a cleaner environment. If your argument for animal testing is that it eliminates human suffering by removing harmful products from the shelves, these cruelty-free products beg to differ. Animal testing is lame. We should all require that we only use the best products- for us and our ethical minds.

Have a question, comment, or want to know more you can do? email me! I'm pretty much bored all the time.

KatiesVeggieTales@gmail.com

The Voice for the Voiceless

"Veggie Tales" and its supporters seek to act as a mediator between non-human and human species. It demands the respect for all life, particularly the life that belongs to those that humans use for convenience. "Veggie Tales" strives to educate the general population- the population that is likely unaware of the torture to animals that occurs daily-about the extent of animal involvement in our lives and our involvement in theirs. Along with mass-education, "Veggie Tales" acts as a resource for aware and activist humans who wish to live a cruelty-free lifestyle. "Veggie Tales" will continue and evolve until Animal Rights are no longer neglected and animals receive the respect they inherently deserve. "Veggie Tales" and all supporters believe that peace is ONLY possible when it takes on all forms: peace towards all races, all nationalities, all religions, and all species.